Category Archives: Perform Better

You got promoted…now what?

So some of you may have gotten promoted with the New Year. Congratulations!

Here are some of my lessons learned.

1. Thank the folks who got you there. I’m talking about the people who really championed you, advised you, were there when you needed them. It’s not always your manager. Either call them or write them a note.  Or bring them a bottle of champagne. It’s a big deal for someone to support you: think of the hundreds of people they come across. They picked you.

2. Be appropriately humble. Remember when Kevin Costner was coaching Tim Robbins on what to say to the press in Bull Durham..”We gotta play it one day at a time”? Yes, it’s boring. But saying things like “you knew this was the year”, “if I didn’t get it this year, I was leaving” or anything like that isn’t what you want repeated around the water cooler.

3. Take a hard and honest look at yourself. What things do you want to get better at? You’re going to be measured against a higher standard, and a more senior peer group. What made you the top of the class before has gotten you to the next level, but at the entry level. Unless you have been way overdue for a promotion, you’re starting at the bottom again. Be honest about what you need to work on to stay at the next level. A big mistake to make is to assume what got you here is what’s going to keep you there.  I have seen situations where newly promoted people weren’t able to keep up with their new peer group.

4. Keep in touch with your mentors. You’re going to be challenged in many different ways than you had been before, and you’re going to need their advice more than ever. Now is not the time to lose them.

5. Take a moment and enjoy what this means. You’ll feel exhilarated, proud, excited, as well as scared, overwhelmed, and nervous. All normal reactions. But before the reality of what it all means sets in, have a 30 second dance party.

 

Help.

Help. A small word, but so powerful.

It means you’re doing something for someone else. You’re trying to get someone to a better place. You are stepping in to turn around a bad situation. It’s about someone else.

Here are a couple of ways to incorporate “help” at work that I like.

1. When someone asks me to do something, I always say “I’m happy to help.”  I don’t say “fine”, “sure”, “ok”. When I say it, I mean: “I am on your side and will work to make you/this successful”.  I saw this happen at a management meeting where a CEO asked one of his directs to do something, and that was the person’s response. It always struck me as a gracious answer.

2. A junior person asked me for advice. She had down time during the day and wanted to do more. She spoke to her manager, but nothing had come out of it. She was wary about constantly asking her manager for more things to do, to own…she didn’t want to seem like a nag.  My suggestion to her was to ask him periodically, “How can I help?” It’s hard to get annoyed when someone’s offering to help.

3. Whenever I finish up my meeting with my manager, I always ask “Is there anything you need help with?” I just find it’s a good way to make sure there isn’t something that needs attention, and he knows that I care.

Here’s what I’ve learned about being my best self: being confident that I could help made it easier to put my fear of failing to the side. So when you find yourself fearful of taking the risk, ask yourself “Can you help?”

A quote I love….”Everyone can be great, because everyone can serve.”

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

“You’re too detail oriented.”

So when someone tells me they got feedback that they’re too detail oriented, it has a couple of possibilities:

1. It could mean that you are so focused on the details, you can’t tell the story or set the context.  So you might know the data, but you can’t explain to people what the data means, or you don’t correlate different pieces of data into an overall conclusion. Force yourself to write a conclusions page: what are the conclusions? What is the decision which needs to be made? What’s the “net net”?

2. It could mean that you’re the law of diminishing returns. Meaning you’re so focused on chasing down the details, that big stuff is going wrong: like missing deadlines, or budgets. The effort you’re spending on the details might not be worth it. Ask yourself “Will it materially change the outcome?”

3. It could mean that they don’t think you know how to be strategic. Yes, details matter. But step back, and ask yourself “Why is this information important? What is it telling us?” My rule of thumb about presenting numbers: the reader should have an immediate reaction of “good” or “bad”.  If they don’t, chances are the data has no context, so they can’t tell if the number is a good one or a bad one. You want it to be clear to your reader. Data does not always equal information.

4. You might be obsessing about stuff no one cares about. Are you one of those folks who continually send presentations back with lots of little corrections at the last minute which don’t change the content of the presentation? Or you bring up questions and make your team chase down issues which aren’t relevant to the overall decision, so it wastes people’s time?  Take a step back: you might be driving everyone crazy.

Details are important for credibility, but too many details without context don’t have much meaning. Make sure you can see the forest for the trees.

How to Help Your Boss Help You

One of my favorite movies is Jerry Maguire. I mean, how could you not love that movie? I love it because it’s about standing up for what you believe in, figuring out what’s important, living a life that’s authentic to you.

The greatest line is when Jerry is telling Rod “Help me help you.” My favorite scene is here.

Many of you are starting to think about your next role…but you don’t know quite how to figure out what that next role is. After all, all you know is your role.  So you have a conversation with your manager….and he/she is equally perplexed how to help you find that next role too because they are also limited to what they know.

So here’s the question I would ask your manager:

“Who are the three people you think I should meet with who could help me figure out what my next role might be?”

Every manager knows three people who can be helpful in this capacity: either because the person has been at the firm a long time (the Guide), or because the individual has had lots of mobility moves themselves (the Mobility Whisperer), or because the person is trusted and respected (the Sage).  Once you get the names, send an email to each of them separately that says something like “Hello G, my name is Sue, and I’m currently working for Joe in x department in Marketing. I’ve been thinking about what my next step might be, and he suggested that you would be a good person to talk to. Can I set some time up on your calendar at your convenience?”  It might take some time to set up, but most people love to share their experiences and help someone else.

This way you can move the ball forward, expand your network, and figure out what your next move might be.

“If all you have is a hammer, every problem is a nail.”

Imagine you’re working on your house. You’re learning how to nail with a hammer. At first, it was awkward, you hit your thumb, didn’t hit the nail straight. But eventually you got better. You mastered the skill. There are other tools: a sander, a wrench, an electrical sensor. But they’re new, and they look scary. You know you won’t be as good with those tools as you are with the hammer.

Here’s the thing. The more tools you know how to use, the more problems you’ll be able to fix. Sure, it won’t feel comfortable. You’ll go through the same learning curve that you did with the hammer. But eventually, you will get the hang of it. And you’ll know how to fix the problem with the right tool: not using the hammer when there’s a much better alternative.

Pushing yourself to learn new skills is the same thing. Yes, it won’t feel comfortable. You’ll miss the hammer. But if you keep pushing yourself and taking the hard assignments, you can be the general contractor, not just the person who knows how to hammer.

 

How to Write

I have struggled with this from the time my English teacher at school gave me C+s on my papers no matter how hard I worked on them. It was incredibly frustrating (plus I didn’t like the teacher). But, I did learn how to get better.

So, I’ll let you in on a lesson learned. There are only 2 rules you need to follow:

1. Use the fewest number of words possible AND

2. Leave nothing open to interpretation

If you are able to meet the above criteria, you will have hit the mark.  It applies to everything: emails, presentations, submissions to a report. I can’t tell you how many times people add tons of detail which isn’t relevant, or they’re ambiguous with their language so that the meaning is unclear.  I have seen situations when one poorly chosen word confused the entire audience. Stop. Take a moment and see if you meet these top two criteria. And re-read your copy of Elements of Style.

26. Be consistent. Random wins don’t make you a first string player.

Consistency is underrated because it’s boring.  But it’s hugely important.

Many times,  I’ve had people point out the times when “they were a leader”, when “they fixed problems”, or “handled things well”.  Yes, but are you consistent? For every time you exhibited those traits, were there times when you didn’t? Or is not demonstrating those traits actually your norm? Consistency means almost always.  You are almost always precise, organized, articulate, strategic, team player….

People value track records, and they value consistency. They want to know that they can always count on you to be predictable. When you’re unpredictable, you’re unreliable.

I’ve sat in a lot of promotion discussions where the issue wasn’t that the person didn’t exhibit the behaviors we were looking for, the issue was they weren’t consistent. Inconsistency raises red flags. It implies risk.

If you get feedback about things you think you do already, ask yourself if you’re consistent and be honest with yourself. When you raise the bar to become more consistent, you raise your game.

What to do when you think your boss hates you.

Someone I worked with in the past put some time on my calendar to catch up. The net net is that she was miserable.

Why? She was having a terrible time with her boss. She found him dismissive and sarcastic, he ignored her emails and requests for help. This has been going on for several months. What to do?

All of us have had the experience of working for someone you can’t connect with. Sometimes, it’s a very bad situation, where you are miserable every day you come in, overcome with anxiety about the future, and walking on eggshells that you’ll make an error.

Here’s the advice I gave:

1. Have a conversation with your manager and put your feelings on the table.  I know this is hard, but it’s the only way to deal with the problem. The key is to stay factual about the behaviors you’re observing, how it makes you feel, and how it’s impacting your ability to work. Either your manager will be surprised and will try to change their behavior, or your manager will agree with you that it’s not working between the two of you.  If it’s not working, think about whether or not the situation can change, or whether or not the relationship isn’t salvageable.  If you don’t think it can be worked out, let your manager know that you think other options need to be considered, like looking for a new role.  The key is to maintain the right tone: this isn’t about trying to address the sins of the past and leaving tomorrow. You want to deal with the problem and move forward, for both of you.

2. Once you ascertain the above, it’s time to take action. If your manager agrees it’s not working, you need to come up with Plan B. You’re better off looking for something else to do. Talk to people you trust, see if there are openings in other areas. You’re not looking to leave in a huff or make a statement, you’re just looking at other options. Sometimes it just doesn’t work.

3. Once you do find  something suitable, let your boss know. You want his or her support: again, you’re not going for a dramatic exit here. They shouldn’t be surprised given that you’ve already had the first conversation.

4. Manage the optics: it’s important that your reasons for moving aren’t because “you and your boss don’t get along”. It’s better to focus on the positive..that another opportunity that seems a better fit came up. Don’t feed the gossip mill.

5. Don’t leave your boss in the lurch. Work on the transition plan, help train the new person. No matter how the other person acts, you always want your behavior to be above reproach.

 

Feedback Decoded: “You need to work on your executive presence”.

When I hear this one, it tells me that you’re doing something that would make people think you’re more junior than you are. The good news is that it’s usually about how people perceive you, as opposed to your content. So a couple of things which may be causing this:

1. Immature behavior: you could joke too much, dress too casually, be perceived as too cavalier about the job, inappropriately oversharing…just doing things more senior people wouldn’t do. Great executives are incredibly consistent, always measured. They never curse, they don’t have outbursts in public, they have a sense of humor, but you know they mean business. Ken Chenault, the CEO of American Express is a great example of consistency. In all his town halls, he is clear, measured, in charge. He always wears a blue blazer with khakis. He always starts on time. He has a sense of humor. As an employee, you feel immense confidence in  him as a leader.

2. You show your negative emotions publicly: you’re frazzled, angry, frantic from running from one thing to another and you show it to people indiscriminately.  No executive ever shows panic…outwardly. They are always calm and collected on the outside. See my previous post  on this here….

3. You have difficulty presenting to a senior audience. Practice, practice, practice. Make notes. What are the 3 points you want to make? Don’t read presentations line by line to senior people…as one managing director once said to me: “I’ve been reading since I was 12.” Ouch.

4. Your language is too personal, too colloquial, you use emoticons in your emails. “You guys” or anything overly familiar will not work. You emote on email….if people only knew how many times those emails are forwarded with a “Can you believe this?” message, they would stop doing this.

5. You’re too quiet. People aren’t sure what your point of view is. You don’t come off as someone who can make the hard decisions…worse you might come off as someone who doesn’t have a clue.

The good news is none of the above is impossible to fix. But it does require you to change your behavior…noticeably. Not just a little. You can’t be a little immature.  I once read a great quote: “I don’t take myself seriously, but I take my job very seriously.”  You need to make sure you’re not switching the two. But you’ll find that once you start focusing on your “executive presence”, people will start noticing. But it does take time to change people’s perceptions.

Why I picked the picture? You ever notice how lifeguards have absolute authority on the beach? I have never seen anyone debate with a lifeguard, who’s usually a kid with a sunburn and a whistle. They take their job seriously and show it. And people respond.

Still Learning (sigh)

So you know when you have one of those weeks when it seemed every day someone was pushing your buttons and you behaved in a way you now regret?

All of us have triggers: something that when someone does it to you, you see red. For me, it’s when someone makes excuses when something goes wrong. I am not happy when mistakes happen, but if you take accountability, explain to me how you’ll make sure it won’t happen again, I’ll get over it.

It’s a mistake to give me a bunch of excuses. I will see red. (BTW, most managers will too).

The problem is that when we see red, we lapse into our more basic “fight or flight” mode. For some people, they will start dissolving in tears. Some people will shout back and get abusive. Some people will shut down.

There is nothing harder than trying to overcome your natural tendencies. The first step is to be aware: what happens when I am in flight or fight mode? What are the warning signs so that I know to pull back, excuse myself, do something so that I’m not pushed into the danger zone? If you are self-aware, you know to take yourself out of the situation before you do something you’ll regret.

Someone sent me this article about what distinguishes the people we love to work for. It’s a great aspirational article that absolutely hits all the right points. I struggled with number 5 this week “They always think before they speak and act.” I didn’t throw a chair, but I did raise my voice and get visibly mad. Now, I’ve learned enough in my career to know not to make it personal, and I know to do number 8.”They never talk out of school”, but still. I wish I could have stayed calm and kept my volume down. I knew the person felt bad. I just didn’t exercise the self restraint because I saw red.

Still learning. Sigh