13. Be brave. Stand up for your position.

It’s easy to avoid antagonism, arguments, aggressive people. It’s much easier to conform and be politically correct. But if you want to learn, lead, and innovate, you have to be brave.

Being brave is always about two things: 1) speaking up and 2) taking the unpopular, but what you believe to be right position.

This is an interesting article by Peter Thiel, who co-founded PayPal, among other achievements. He talks about how great companies succeed, not by competing with each other, but by being so good at what they do, no one can provide a substitute.  I think this is also how people succeed: not because they compete with each other, but because they are great at what they do, and because not many others do the work necessary to come close.

He also talks about the problem of conformity “We never really push the envelope; we never really ask the tough questions.”  I love the last line of his article:  “And remember, we live in a world in which courage is in far shorter supply than genius.”

So don’t let the moment pass by being silent. Speak up. Be brave.

Mobility

I am a big believer in mobility because I like variability. In college, I liked the electives better than my core courses. I like the sides better than the main course. I like accessories better than the outfit.

A lot of people ask me about mobility: how I did it. It happened two ways for me.

1. Someone told me I was moving. Now at the time, I was often not happy about it. I felt like I had just gotten the hang of things, and they were moving me already? Looking back, those moves were the best opportunities of my career. I learned how to adapt to change, how to get the lay of the land quickly, how to assess people, and how to build relationships and teams. Every time I moved, I had to do all of these things all over again. So it was great practice because those skills are important in managing your career. Others saw in me potential I didn’t see in myself.

2. I raised my hand. There were times when I felt that I had “overstayed” my welcome. That the job was pretty much business-as-usual, and that there wasn’t anything that was going to surprise me. My gut would tell me it was time to move…to try something else, to challenge myself, and keep learning.  In those situations, I would have a conversation with my manager about possible next steps.

Regardless of which way mobility happens, there are a couple of things to keep in mind:

1. Stay in your job long enough to have contributed. Jumping from one role to the next isn’t a sign of progress, it’s a sign of someone who’s chasing the next thing. And jumping for the money alone isn’t a good enough reason.

2. Be patient about your next move. Good moves take time (great jobs don’t tend to stay open long). Sometimes it’s about timing.

3. Don’t lose focus on the job you’re in today. You still have to perform. Don’t neglect your day job.

4. Educate yourself: talk to people in different roles. Ask them what they like about their job. Ask them what they don’t like. A peer is likely to be a lot more honest with you than a manager who’s selling you a role. I always spoke to someone who worked for the manager who was interviewing me.

5. Be picky. I have turned down roles I didn’t think were right. I’ve never looked back and thought : “Wow, I really should have taken that role.”  I have thought: “Gee, I should have stayed longer.”

 

 

Don’t be an order taker

This is a big pet peeve of mine. When someone acts like “an order taker.”

What do I mean by that? You get a request or a task which is dependent on inputs from someone else, and you just pass it through. You copy and paste into your document and pass it on. You accept the requirements. You don’t question. You just fill the order.

Does it take a lot more work to ask questions and ask for clarification? You bet. But if it passes through your hands, it’s now yours. You’ve taken their inputs and incorporated it into your output: whether it’s a report, a system enhancement, a change request.  So if you had no idea what they were talking about, it doesn’t put you in the best position to defend what you did. And “that’s what they said” isn’t a great explanation.

Ask the questions. Make sure you understand what they’re trying to convey. They may get irritated, but explain why you’re asking… because you want the best possible outcome. And don’t constantly send it back with lots of little comments or questions. Set up a meeting, walk through it, and if need be, take the pen. Everyone will be better off.

You didn’t get promoted…now what?

Nothing is more disappointing than not getting something you were expecting/hoping for.

In my career, I have had many people come to my office upset because they didn’t get promoted. I always ask the one question:

“Did you have a conversation with your manager about promotion?”

Every time, the answer is no.

I know everyone wants to believe that their works speaks for itself. That it will come to them because they deserve it. That it’s impolite to bring it up if your manager hasn’t.

Nope. Here’s the reason why: your manager may think you’re not interested.

Once you have the conversation, a couple of things will happen:

1. Your manager will be supportive: you’ll work on a plan together to make it happen.  If your manager is supportive, you’ll probably see the change right away. Someone I spoke to who did this saw that she was given much more exposure, invited to more meetings, and given the ball more frequently. That’s exactly what should happen.

2. Your manager might be surprised and not think you’re ready. The question you need to ask is “Is my promotion an if or a when question”?   Someday is different than never.

If the answer is “when”, you need to have a frank conversation about what you need to work on. Is it platform, perception, or performance? (see LL#24)  Create a set of action steps with your manager, and schedule a quarterly touch base on how the plan is progressing. Don’t get too hung up on timeframes: you want to be ready when it happens.

If the answer is “if”, meaning they’re not convinced you can operate at the next level, you need to ask yourself the hard question: “Is my manager right?”

I have had many conversations in my career with people who thought they were ready to be promoted, but I didn’t agree. Often it’s a timing issue. But sometimes, it’s not, especially at the more senior level. It’s a hard conversation to have because the individual compares themselves to other people at that level, or because they are strong performers in their current role.  But that’s not the only thing needed. So here are two things to think about:

1. Do you trust your manager’s opinion?  If your manager is telling you you’re not ready, are they specific with your areas of weakness? Is your manager respected within his or her peer group?  Have you heard this feedback before? Do you think other people you respect would agree with your manager’s assessment? Do you respect your manager’s opinion? Do you think it can be changed?

2. Why do you think you should be promoted? Will you be able to meet the criteria of the new role? Have you demonstrated that consistently to a meaningful population? Why does your opinion differ from your manager’s?

Keep in mind: it’s easy for a manager to put a candidate forward, and let the process weed weak candidates out. It’s a lot harder for a manager to have the honest conversation. It may not be what you want to hear, but at least they told you the truth from their perspective. There is nothing worse than 1) the promotion that clearly was too early, or 2) the loss of a talented person who didn’t realize they were on the promotion track.

So in order to prevent those two things from happening, have the conversation before you decide what to do next.

 

Quotes I Love

I was re-reading my journal and came across this quote I had copied from somewhere that I think is so profound.

“Worry is the product of a future that we cannot guarantee.

Guilt is the product of a past we cannot change.”

So, my lesson learned is that all you can do is your best in the present. You can learn from your past, and anticipate and plan for the future, but if you can say that you’re done your best today, you’ve done all you can.

13. Be a true team player.

Out of all the lessons learned, I would put this one in my top 3.

Being a team player is not about lip service. It’s about truly believing that the power of a team will be better than the single contributor.

I have never, in my entire career, met someone who was so good that they did better than the team would do. So here’s some observations about what it takes to be a true team player, all learned when I played JV basketball in high school, which I loved. But was terrible at.

1. You communicate quickly to help those in trouble.

This means you don’t just watch people go over a cliff if you think they’re headed the wrong way. It means you figure out a way to help them, to pull them aside, to guide them. On the court, that means you yell at your teammates “Heads up!” so they know what’s going on. You are fast and loud, but for their best interest. Teammates don’t take it personally.

2. You go after a loose ball, even if it’s not your job.

One of the rules of basketball: you go after the ball. If it breaks loose, is headed out of bounds, you go after it if you’re the closest to it. You don’t argue whether or not it’s your job. When you’re on a team, if you see a ball that needs to be picked up, do it. You can argue position later.

3. You work with each other to get better, but you don’t ignore your skills either.

For basketball, that’s practice every day for hours. Individual training and team play practice. And scrimmages against each other. And of course, the games.

At work, it comes in the form of staff meetings, individual development plans, individual and team goals, and execution. Every day you’re going out on the court. How did you play today? How did your team do? You can’t win as an individual if your team loses. And your team can win, but not be helped by you.

4. You have coaches, you have captains, you have stars.

Their job is to win, and do what’s best for the team. You don’t get to pick if you want to be the coach, captain or star. The coach is the one held accountable for how the team does.  The captain is elected by the team. And you’re a star if you are clearly the go-to person.  You’re not always going to like how this plays out, but it is what it is.  A lot of people want to be stars…but are you the go-to person? And don’t resent the stars: support them, and be glad for the lift they give the team. If you want to be a captain….did the team elect you? If you’re a coach, do you hold yourself accountable for the team’s performance, or do you look for excuses?

5. The team is bigger than just the players on the court.

Teams are big for a reason. When someone gets hurt or tired, the second string gets tapped and has to perform. Everyone matters. Don’t make the mistake of defining your team too narrowly (“My team is just who reports to me”). The more you exhibit teamwork across the biggest, most inclusive definition of team, the more successful you’ll be.

When you win, you savor the moment for a few hours. But you’re already onto the next game, the next challenge. Nothing promises that you’ll do it again next time. Just like work.

 

Do what needs to be done today

It’s easy to get frustrated when your day is interrupted, or doesn’t go as planned. Unexpected phone calls, meetings cancelled or moved up, crises, problems. So how do you cope?

No matter what happens, make sure you do what needs to be done today.

As long as you stay focused on that principle, you’ll work on the right priorities.  You’re likely to spend your time wisely. More importantly, you’re setting up for a better tomorrow.

A big lesson learned for me? Schedule capacity. That means you block time out on your calendar. Sprinkle half hour  placeholders throughout your week to make sure you create capacity for the unplanned. I used to schedule my day with back to back meetings. I would have no time to deal with important issues without disrupting my whole schedule. I would get frustrated because by the time I got back to my desk, everyone was gone.

So before you let the day’s emails, appointments, and requests take over your day, make sure you’ve decided what needs to be done today. But also make sure you have the capacity to do it.

You got promoted…now what?

So some of you may have gotten promoted with the New Year. Congratulations!

Here are some of my lessons learned.

1. Thank the folks who got you there. I’m talking about the people who really championed you, advised you, were there when you needed them. It’s not always your manager. Either call them or write them a note.  Or bring them a bottle of champagne. It’s a big deal for someone to support you: think of the hundreds of people they come across. They picked you.

2. Be appropriately humble. Remember when Kevin Costner was coaching Tim Robbins on what to say to the press in Bull Durham..”We gotta play it one day at a time”? Yes, it’s boring. But saying things like “you knew this was the year”, “if I didn’t get it this year, I was leaving” or anything like that isn’t what you want repeated around the water cooler.

3. Take a hard and honest look at yourself. What things do you want to get better at? You’re going to be measured against a higher standard, and a more senior peer group. What made you the top of the class before has gotten you to the next level, but at the entry level. Unless you have been way overdue for a promotion, you’re starting at the bottom again. Be honest about what you need to work on to stay at the next level. A big mistake to make is to assume what got you here is what’s going to keep you there.  I have seen situations where newly promoted people weren’t able to keep up with their new peer group.

4. Keep in touch with your mentors. You’re going to be challenged in many different ways than you had been before, and you’re going to need their advice more than ever. Now is not the time to lose them.

5. Take a moment and enjoy what this means. You’ll feel exhilarated, proud, excited, as well as scared, overwhelmed, and nervous. All normal reactions. But before the reality of what it all means sets in, have a 30 second dance party.