As I get older, one of the things I’ve noticed is that the biggest problems aren’t typically “big events” but the accumulation of bad habits over time. Just like time can help (compounding!), time can hurt as well. And as you get older, you start seeing the incremental impact of all these habits…good and bad. So what are some of the lessons I’m learning?
- It’s ok to do nothing. This is huge for me. I’ve always worked, and usually in demanding jobs. I’ve taken time off because of a family health issue and I’m grateful I did because the recovery has been so much tougher than the actual surgery. People tend to move on after the surgery outcome…after all, the hard part is done right? But what I find is that the recovery is much longer…good days and bad days, and the need to stay vigilante on wound care. Creating the capacity where I can focus has been critical.
- Stop bad habits now. No excuses. A dear friend of mine is battling bladder cancer…thankfully he’s in remission but the treatments were brutal. We were surprised that smoking was the cause. If he had known then what he knows now? He would have quit in a heartbeat.
- Stop ignoring stuff you know you shouldn’t: health and money issues tend to get deprioritized because they are scary and anxiety producing. But those issues tend to be the harder ones to dig yourself out of if they get out of control.
- Be ruthless about making life easier: I had a conversation with a friend who always had tremendous stress trying to keep her husband’s children happy…birthdays and holidays were brutal. And she never received a thank you. She finally decided to stop…and got back her peace of mind.
- Work from a place of good: I avoided certain people because I was concerned about their reactions. When a recent incident made it impossible, I realized it just didn’t matter, and the people didn’t even react badly… I had made it much bigger in my mind than it really was. And as long as I operated from a place of good, my conscience was clear anyway.