So, the reality is that work stress is inevitable in life. In fact, you can reach higher levels of performance when you’re under stress…it’s the adrenaline that can push you to perform better. That’s good stress.
Bad work stress is the kind that does the opposite: it deteriorates your performance. Here are the situations to be aware of, and some tips to manage them.
- Situational stress: these are times when there is a trigger, and it makes you lose control of yourself: either you dissolve in tears, react in anger, or retreat into silence when you should be speaking up. Figure out what your trigger is (for an old boss of mine, it was feeling like he was being spoken to condescendingly), and when it happens:
- Recognize the trigger: Say to yourself “this is my trigger” and step back from the situation. Take a deep breath, excuse yourself until you are calmer in spite of the trigger and respond appropriately.
- Constant stress: this is the stress I define as “a way of life”. When I see people who are constantly stressed, they are usually overscheduled: saying yes to everything, signing up for everything. They know they can’t possibly do all of it well, but they don’t want to say no.
- Cancel all non essential activities: it’s better to do a few things well than a lot of things poorly. Write down what you’re spending your time on, and figure out how to give yourself back the time.
- The nagging stress: this is the stress that’s caused by “what if” scenarios that you can’t control but worry about- “what if I lose my job?”. What I do in those situations is ask myself:
- What are the possible outcomes: worst case scenario to best.
- What is the probability of each outcome? What is the most likely?
- What can I do about it?
A friend told me a great saying his mother said to him, “Hard work doesn’t kill you, stress does.” Keep working hard, but manage the stress.