Lessons Learned: Post Surgical Care

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted because I’ve been taking care of someone who is recovering from surgery.  As we get older, the people we love are getting older too and needing medical care…particularly  people with underlying conditions.  So here’s my lessons learned for those of you in those situations….

A lot of people said to me that since I was a good project manager, this was right up my alley. Yes….and no. So here’s what I learned….

  • Prep
    • It’s easier to get everything you think you’ll need ahead of time than to run around trying to get it later. Even though Amazon is your best friend, things like shower chairs, toilet risers, canes, blood pressure machines, oximeters, thermometers, and walkers…even one day without these things can be difficult….and supply chain delays are wreaking havoc on the ability to get things quickly.
    • Do every day chores ahead of time: laundry, cleaning, food shopping, clean out the freezer and fridge.  Replace the broken coffeemaker. Clear the deck of all regularly scheduled activities to create capacity…you will need it.
    • Figure out logistics: if the hospital can fill prescriptions when you leave, do that. How are you getting there? How are you coming home? What are the rules about visiting?  COVID has created new rules around visiting….for instance, our hospital only allowed two visitors a day, and if you left, you couldn’t come back in the building without special permission.
    • Figure out ahead of time what’s going to be required: I was able to find a physical therapist who makes house calls. Not needed right away, but good to know you have a plan.
  • During
    • Bring the weird things that the person wants: razor, lip balm….I found baby wipes useful.  The paper.  A cup of decaf. Ear plugs/eye masks.
    • The nurses are the people taking care of your loved one. I brought dozens of bagels, cookies, food just to say thank you.
    • Ask questions. What meds? What are good metrics?  Get educated because you will take over what they are doing for the patient once you go home.
  • After
    • Make sure “going home” clothes are ok given surgical sites, etc.  One thing I was unprepared for….how swollen the feet get post surgery!  It was hard getting shoes back on…shoe horns or larger shoes will help.
    • Bring things home ahead of discharge day: you’d be surprised how much stuff you accumulate plus the hospital supplies like spirometers, urinals, bandages.
    • Discharge Day
      • This is probably the most important time. We ended up getting a Rollator walker which was invaluable: the hospital got it for us before we left.
      • Ask for phone numbers once you get home: who do you call if you have a question? Who do you call if there’s an emergency?  There might be a special number to call…not just 911.
  • Just like a project, keep track of key metrics. It’s a good way of establishing the trend. Sometimes you can skip a med (for instance if the blood pressure is already low, the nurse practitioner might tell you to skip).  You will come home with directions, but if circumstances change, you need to adjust as well.  Plus, when you go for your follow up check up, you can bring the data.
  • Be vigilante on wound care: we ended up needing extra care on the wound. If we left it alone, it would have taken longer and possibly get infected.  If it doesn’t look right, go see the doctor.
  • Pain management: this is a tough one. Narcotics create constipation, but pain inhibits recovery. Getting the right balance is challenging but don’t be afraid to let the doctors know when it’s not working.  They will have lots of options.

How to support the care givers? This is my personal view on what helped….and what didn’t.

  • Food, flowers, cards….all appreciated. Food that I can eat too was really appreciated.
  • Don’t text or call me all the time asking for updates. It becomes another task I have to do when I already have a lot I’m dealing with. The best texts? “What can I do?” or “We are thinking of you.” There was one person who every time they called, I was busy. Not helpful.
  • Offer to take tasks off my plate: running to the drugstore, the store, bringing dinner…that helps.
  • If you haven’t spoken to me in awhile, wait to re-engage. Like it or not, I’m going to prioritize who I need to talk to….if I haven’t reached out, you’re not on the need to know list.  Good rule of thumb? Did you know ahead of time, and were we talking? It doesn’t mean you don’t matter to me….it’s just that right now, I have limited capacity.
  • Be sensitive about visiting. It’s tiring to the patient, plus it’s disruptive to the routine. Other people might already be coming….my experience is one visit a day is the maximum. Wait to be invited unless you are a close family member or friend.

While it’s exhausting, frustrating, and aggravating….focus changes outcomes in faster recovery, faster healing.