I read this interesting article from MIT/Sloane that talked about how to categorize the relationships you have at work.  Essentially, every relationship you have is based on whether or not they are conditional or unconditional.

Unconditional extremes create enemies and friends: no matter what the conditions, they’re going to feel the way they do about you, and act accordingly.  Conditional relationships is where there is more flexibility: if we’re aligned, or not aligned in our objectives, you are an ally or an adversary.

I thought this was very enlightening, because I think it’s very easy to misclassify people. One mistake they cite is mistaking allies for friends, and the example they give is when someone leaves the organization and feels bad because they no longer hear from the people they worked with.  In this case, it’s likely that those people were allies, rather than friends: conditional because of the mutual alignment.

It’s important to be able to “call a spade a spade.” How are you classifying the people you work with? Who are your  friends vs allies? Are you spending too much time trying to convert an enemy? Are you mis-classifying someone who’s really an adversary an enemy?