It’s not easy being brave.

A young girl came to see me to seek my advice. She looked liked she was about to burst into tears. She started to tell me why she was upset.

A lot of times, when someone  junior is upset, it’s because they’ve taken feedback too hard. They usually just need a pat on the back, and they can get back into the game.

But as I listened to her story, the examples, the specifics, I knew it wasn’t one of those conversations. She needed to talk to human resources. But she was scared of the following:

1. “No one will believe me over someone who has a lot of experience.” Not true. Most people will judge the case on its own merits. Be clear, be specific.

2. “What if he/she retaliates against me?” Well, if you’ve already alerted HR, that would be dumb. Now they are creating a clear pattern of bad behavior.

3. “What if I just ignore it? Maybe it will go away.” Maybe. But life’s too short to come in every day walking on eggshells and feeling bad.

She was still unsure what to do. My last comment to her was: “If you don’t do anything, I guarantee you will leave the firm. You won’t want to work here anymore, understandably so. Don’t let your manager do that to you.”

She spoke to HR and she’s moving into a new role. And the manager? I guess we’ll see…but it’s hard to get ahead when you’re not self-aware.

You’re the sparkler. Don’t let someone put it out.

In the words of Patrick Swayze….”No one puts Baby in the corner.”