{"id":3010,"date":"2020-10-08T23:06:04","date_gmt":"2020-10-08T23:06:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mylessonslearned.co\/?p=3010"},"modified":"2020-10-08T23:06:04","modified_gmt":"2020-10-08T23:06:04","slug":"34-dont-take-things-personally","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mylessonslearned.co\/?p=3010","title":{"rendered":"34. Don’t Take Things Personally"},"content":{"rendered":"

This was a new one I had added after the original list was created. This is one of my biggest weaknesses….for some reason, I would always attribute another’s person reaction\/non reaction to <\/span>something I had done.\u00a0 Which would be ok if it was balanced…but I found I did it when I thought the reaction was negative.\u00a0 I would often jump to conclusions….someone didn’t answer me back on email right away because they thought my email was stupid.\u00a0 They didn’t return my call because I wasn’t important enough.\u00a0 They didn’t stop to chat with me when they walked by my office because they don’t like me. What I realized was that <\/span>this was almost never the case<\/strong>. I was creating a negative narrative in my head.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Why would I do this?\u00a0 A couple of reasons…mostly, I think we all want positive feedback.\u00a0 If we do something, we want to know that we did it well.\u00a0 I also had enough self-doubt that I would assume something was wrong and jump to conclusions.\u00a0 I still do it now.<\/p>\n

So here’s the real list of why people typically don’t respond:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. They are busy<\/strong>. Seriously. People are busy and you might not be the priority. Priority tends to be the problems that you need to stop or address. If someone’s ok, you can get to them later. Believe me, if I had a problem with something you sent out, I’d find you….fast.<\/li>\n
  2. They don’t think they have anything to add.<\/strong>\u00a0 You got it….why bother to add anything else? They trust you.<\/li>\n
  3. They have something really big going on in their lives which has nothing to do with you.<\/strong>\u00a0 I found one of my bosses really remote for a week…turns out her dad was in the hospital.<\/li>\n
  4. They work at a slower pace<\/strong>: I like to get through all my email same day. Some people don’t.<\/li>\n
  5. They’re not ready to come back with a response:\u00a0<\/strong>this can happen a lot when you’re asking for a favor, interviewing for a new role.\u00a0 They need time.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    If you find yourself in a situation where you’re starting to drive yourself crazy, just drop a quick note or ask “hi…were you ok with what I sent?”\u00a0 Usually, it’s fine. But you can at least stop the internal dialogue that’s making you nuts.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    This was a new one I had added after the original list was created. This is one of my biggest weaknesses….for some reason, I would always attribute another’s person reaction\/non reaction to something I had done.\u00a0 Which would be ok if it was balanced…but I found I did it when I thought the reaction was […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":3012,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[34],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3010","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-making-life-easier"],"yoast_head":"\n34. Don't Take Things Personally - My Lessons Learned<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/mylessonslearned.co\/?p=3010\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"34. Don't Take Things Personally - My Lessons Learned\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This was a new one I had added after the original list was created. This is one of my biggest weaknesses….for some reason, I would always attribute another’s person reaction\/non reaction to something I had done.\u00a0 Which would be ok if it was balanced…but I found I did it when I thought the reaction was […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/mylessonslearned.co\/?p=3010\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"My Lessons Learned\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-10-08T23:06:04+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/mylessonslearned.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/jeshoots-com-2vD8lIhdnw-unsplash-scaled.jpg?fit=2560%2C1707&ssl=1\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"2560\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1707\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Grace Park\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Grace Park\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/mylessonslearned.co\\\/?p=3010#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/mylessonslearned.co\\\/?p=3010\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Grace Park\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/mylessonslearned.co\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/2ba6f6f4cc7db205d4df8346745ee782\"},\"headline\":\"34. 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