{"id":2473,"date":"2019-01-10T12:37:18","date_gmt":"2019-01-10T12:37:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mylessonslearned.co\/?p=2473"},"modified":"2019-01-10T12:37:25","modified_gmt":"2019-01-10T12:37:25","slug":"bad-behavior","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mylessonslearned.co\/?p=2473","title":{"rendered":"Bad Behavior"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">To the employee &#8211; You think you know it all. You think you should be promoted already. You think you&#8217;re much smarter than your manager. And you do all sorts of things as a result of your opinion of yourself. So let me tell you the reality:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>Everyone knows you&#8217;re in it for you. Nothing is more blatantly transparent that someone who only cares about their own agenda. It doesn&#8217;t endear you to others, it doesn&#8217;t make colleagues want to work with you, it doesn&#8217;t make other managers want you. You come off as suspect.<\/li><li>You do stupid things which show it. Like having meetings two levels up. Leaving your manager out of the loop. Not responding to emails.  Making sure your manager doesn&#8217;t know what&#8217;s going on. Not cc&#8217;ing them on key emails, not telling them things they need to know. Being hard to find.<\/li><li>You honestly believe this is a strategy. Maybe you read somewhere that you have to act like you&#8217;re already at the level you want to be at. This is not what that means. Please! Just stop. <\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">To the manager: so what do you do when you have one of these types of people working for you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><strong>Have the honest conversation.<\/strong> Brutally honest. But keep your cool..stick to the facts. Show how they exhibit a pattern. Explain how it&#8217;s counterproductive and affecting performance: yours, hers\/his, others. The key point here is not whether or not you two like each other&#8230;.it&#8217;s how the behavior is affecting performance. Talk about how it is hurting the individual. How the individual is getting a reputation. How others have noticed the bad behavior. But no throwing other people under the bus.<\/li><li><strong>Offer to help the person\u00a0but\u00a0make\u00a0it\u00a0clear\u00a0that\u00a0this\u00a0is\u00a0it<\/strong>. Either they are 1) oblivious (but I doubt it), 2) thought it was actually a good strategy&#8230;either way, hopefully they are willing to change. Give them feedback constantly&#8230;..this is you helping. Call them out on it. Like &#8220;that email you sent? It shouldn&#8217;t have been forwarded to me by everyone on it who saw I wasn&#8217;t on it.&#8221; But make it clear that if the person doesn&#8217;t change, there will be<a href=\"https:\/\/mylessonslearned.co\/?p=50\"> changes.<\/a><\/li><li><strong>Make sure your manager has your back<\/strong>. Chances are this person already has been running to Mom or Dad. Keep them updated on what&#8217;s going on and how you&#8217;re handling it. Understand though, this is your job&#8230;.they can&#8217;t manage the situation for you. If you&#8217;re getting taken advantage of, they&#8217;re going to expect you to handle it. Also let them know if they&#8217;re inadvertently enabling the bad behavior (e.g. giving them access).<\/li><li><strong>Tell HR<\/strong>. In order to get out of the he said\/she said, you need a third party. It doesn&#8217;t need to be a formal written thing, but they need to be made aware. They&#8217;ve seen this a million times,&#8230;and a good HR person will give you perspective too. Keep notes of the conversation, dates of the discussions.<\/li><li><strong>Look at this as a development opportunity.<\/strong> You&#8217;re going to have people like this no matter what role you&#8217;re in&#8230;.whether it&#8217;s a troublesome colleague, an unsupportive boss. <strong>Being able to deal with difficult people is the hardest lesson to learn as a manager.<\/strong> Your job isn&#8217;t to keep the peace&#8230;it&#8217;s to ensure that the right people are in the firm to get things done. Either this person is an asset to the firm or  they&#8217;re not.<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>To the employee &#8211; You think you know it all. You think you should be promoted already. You think you&#8217;re much smarter than your manager. And you do all sorts of things as a result of your opinion of yourself. So let me tell you the reality: Everyone knows you&#8217;re in it for you. Nothing [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2477,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2473","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Bad Behavior - My Lessons Learned<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/mylessonslearned.co\/?p=2473\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Bad Behavior - My Lessons Learned\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"To the employee &#8211; You think you know it all. 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